Friday, May 23, 2008
It's really tough.
Now, I ain't like most of any other kids of my age who have both their parents to rely on. As the elder son with a responsibility passed down by my father, it's my duty to take good care of my mum and bro, which I failed to do so in recent weeks. I neglected my mum, and led her down, again and again. I led my dad down too. I'm such a useless brat.
& my level of studies are way below my expectations before the start of the semester. I screwed up my first two tests - COST and FACC, which are supposed to be the easiest tests.
& to my girlfriend Sheery, I'm sorry that I made you tear again. I ain't as good as what you said me to be. I may spend very lil time with you for the next one to two months cos I'm going to put more focus on my family and studies. & thanks for being understanding and supportive of my actions, telling and assuring me that you will be alright, and believing in me. I think you are really great.
& my vacation tutoring of my students is coming soon after a few weeks break after their exams, which means that my schedule will be even more packed this upcoming holidays.
My friends, my life, my own time management, forms a very crucial part in my life too. In the past whenever I have any difficulties, my dad would encourage me, give me advises on what to do and what is the most important thing out of all the problems.
But now, I have to find all the answers myself.
It's just so difficult to strike a balance between all these factors of life. I'm really trying very hard to. Sometimes, I just feel like giving up. But I guess I will regret, if I were to give up any of these. You may say I'm greedy, but I really don't wanna lose any of them. Without any of them, I would not become what I am today.
I'm willing to try harder. I really hope that I can do well in all aspects of life, and be as great as how my dad was.
10:18 PM
nothing shall foretell my return
